Theophrastus: The Scientist with a Gossip Column
Instead of just classifying plants, he catalogued human personalities—right down to the guy who borrows your oil and never gives it back.
Theophrastus: The Scientist with a Gossip Column, public domain
Plants and Peculiar People
Theophrastus is often remembered for dissecting flowers and seeds. But he also dissected Athens itself—writing vivid sketches of people you’d meet on the street. His work, The Characters, reads like a 2,300-year-old version of a city gossip column.
The Hypocrite, the Bore, the Flatterer
He divides Greeks not by tribe or class, but by their quirks. The man who forgets your name, the woman who always expects a favor, the friend who never pays a debt. Theophrastus catalogs them like botanical specimens—sharp, a little pitiless, and very real.
Cataloguing the Soul
In Theophrastus, we see humanity as a living, shifting field—just as complex as the gardens he tended. His types still walk our streets—proof that the human species changes even less than the olive tree.
Known as the 'father of botany,' Theophrastus also wrote The Characters—a book full of sharp, funny sketches of everyday Greeks. He mapped the public garden and the human soul with the same precision.
